To Demetrius: On Compunction (Book 1)

ADMONITION ON THE TWO BOOKS ON COMPUNCTION

At what time Chrysostom published these two books, of which the former is inscribed to Demetrius and the latter to Stelechius, he himself indicates in Book I, no. 6, where he says: *“Οτε γὰρ πρώην ἐγὼ ἐγνώκειν, τήν πόλιν ἀφεὶς, ἐπὶ τὰς σκηνὰς τῶν μοναχῶν ἐλθεῖν, etc. When I had recently determined to leave the city and betake myself to the tents of the monks, I was anxiously seeking and inquiring whence a supply of necessities might be had, etc.”* When, therefore, he wrote this, he had recently withdrawn to the monasteries; now he withdrew in the year 374 or 375. Whence it follows that in the year 375, or at the latest 376, the first book at least, addressed to Demetrius, had been issued; for if we were to assign a later time, the word *πρώην*, “recently,” would seem unable to fit.

Tillemont, who seems not to have paid sufficient attention to the passage adduced above, and who did not notice the word “recently,” thinks he observes such a great difficulty against this temporal calculation that, almost led astray, he leans toward another opinion. His words are: «We place the books on compunction among those which Chrysostom published in solitude, that we may follow those who preceded us, namely Baronius, Hermant, and Du Pin. Yet we do not sufficiently perceive by what argument induced they may have determined this; indeed, Chrysostom seems in writing this to profess himself a presbyter, when he says: *“But we, on account of empty glory and absurd ambition, have also ruined this precept, while we rashly and without examination admit corrupt, incredulous men, weighed down by six hundred vices, to the participation of the mysteries, and before they have given an accurate proof of their mind and conviction, we reveal all dogmas to them, etc.”* I know indeed that he is speaking generally here of the evils which were admitted everywhere in the Church: but would a reader or a monk speak in such a way? Hermant certainly changed his opinion for this reason, thinking that the holy man wrote this when he was teaching the people publicly, i. e., when he was already a presbyter.»

Thus far Tillemont, who, while he says he is ignorant by what argument Baronius and others were led to think that Chrysostom wrote these words in retreat and solitude, demonstrates that he did not advert to these words of Chrysostom: *“When I had recently determined to leave the city and betake myself to the tents of the monks”*; for it is seen clearer than the light that it was a little after he had determined this that he wrote these things, and indeed while he was living in retreat, as is proven as much from these words as from those that follow. But that difficulty which he brings forward from Hermant—so far from being able to overthrow so manifest a testimony—is of no substance at all. For when he says: *“But we, on account of empty glory and absurd ambition, have also ruined this precept, while we rashly and without examination admit corrupt, incredulous men, weighed down by six hundred vices, to the participation of the mysteries, and before they have given an accurate proof of their mind and conviction, we reveal all dogmas to them; and although they have not yet been able to see the vestibules, we immediately lead them into the inner shrines, etc.”*—when he says these things, I say, he is in no way testifying that he or his fellow presbyters under Flavian admitted anything similar, as anyone can see, but by a trope familiar to him, he assumes the persona of those who would admit such things. For nothing is more frequent in Chrysostom than to assume the persona—of those about whom or on whose account he is discoursing—of priests, presbyters, and not rarely even of married men. Thus in the book to a faithful father, no. 4, after he proved that they are subject to the same secular duties as the monks were, he continues: *“Therefore, since, as has been clearly demonstrated by us, we are subject to the same duties to which the monks are, let us run the easier path, and draw our children to it.”* And ibid., no. 17: *“Therefore, let us not take our children away from the contemplation of the desert before the time, but let us allow the disciplines to be more deeply impressed, and the plants to be secured by their roots.”* So generally in Chrysostom the assumption of a persona is observed. Therefore, let us not overturn the calculation of time posited by Chrysostom himself, but we must confirm even that familiar mutation of persons with a new example.

We have furthermore published a new translation, because the old one of an uncertain writer was for the most part satisfying neither, nor was it sufficiently accurate.

TO DEMETRIUS THE MONK: ON COMPUNCTION, BOOK ONE

^A 1. When I see you, blessed Demetrius, constantly persisting with me and, with such vehemence, demanding discourses on compunction, I have always both blessed and admired the purity of your soul. For it is not possible for anyone to come to such a desire for these words unless he has first thoroughly purified himself and risen above all worldly cares. And it is easy to perceive this from those who are possessed even for a little while by this longing: that they receive such a sudden transformation, so that they are immediately translated to heaven! For, having released the soul, as if from certain heavy bonds—the cares of the world—they allow it to fly to its own proper and kindred place. ^B But for the many, this is wont to happen but rarely in the whole of their life; for you, however, O divine head, I know you to be occupied with this fire of compunction at all times. And the sleepless nights would bear witness to me, and the fountains of tears, and the love of solitude ever settling and maturing in your soul. What, then, more could come to you from our words? For indeed, even this very thing—to have reached the summit itself, yet to think that you are still among those who walk upon the earth, and to call your winged ^C soul stony, and constantly to grasp my right hand and, kissing it and weeping, to say, "Crush my hardened heart"—of what great piety, of what great fervor would one consider these things to be signs? If, therefore, you have drawn me into this subject wishing to awaken me as I sleep, and—

if you have taught me in another way—that we have no need of anyone from among ourselves. But if we shall take it in this way, and we shall be ^B accounted worthy of all things in return, and of the boldness of speech towards God and of the generosity of His concern, and of the love towards us—that we might in return for these things be compensated by such goods, so that we might even be able to amend our life for the future, and even in the present be able to awaken the sleeping and to brace and restore the souls that lie prone.

Whence, then, for us, whence shall be the beginning of this discourse? What foundation, what base shall we place? If not the words of Christ, who pronounces those who are miserable to be those who laugh, but those who mourn to be blessed, in these words: "Blessed are they that mourn, for they shall be comforted" (Matt. 5:4), and, "Woe unto you that laugh now, for you shall mourn and weep" (Luke 6:25). And with good reason, indeed; for the whole time of this present life is truly a time for mourning, and for weeping and lamentation. Such a calamity has seized the whole world, such evils detain all men, that if anyone should wish to weigh them with precision—if indeed it is possible to do so with precision—he would never cease from mourning and weeping. Thus, you see, all things are overturned and confused, so that there is no trace of virtue anywhere.

What is far more unfortunate is that we do not even have a perception of the evils that occupy us, nor do we provide it to others; but we are like bodies that are flourishing on the outside, but are melting away with fire on the inside. Being devoid of any perception, we differ nothing from those who are out of their minds, who say and do many dangerous and shameful things without fear, and are not held by any shame, but boast and think themselves wiser than those standing by. Thus, even we, though we are doing all things that belong to the sick, do not even know that we are sick.

But as for the body, if even a slight infirmity is present, we call in physicians, we spend money, we exhibit perseverance, nor do we cease from doing everything until we rid ourselves of the ailment; but our souls, stung daily by wounds, torn apart by bodily ^C affections, scorched, driven through precipices, and in every way perishing, we do not have even the slightest care for. The cause of this thing is that the disease has seized everyone. And just as, if among those sick in body there were no one healthy to be found, nothing would prevent all from falling into extreme ruin, with no one checking their unbridled lusts; so too among us, because no one is perfectly healthy in faith, but all, some more and some less, are infirm, there is no one who might help those lying prone. For if someone coming from the outside, and having learned well both the commandments of Christ and the confusion of our life, were to recognize them, I know not if he would consider any others to be more inimical to Christ than we are: for we run this path as if we wished to enter the one contrary to His commands.

But that you might not think these things to be said by us from excess, I shall now attempt to bring forward the proof, and from nowhere else than from the very commands of Christ. What then does Christ say? "You have heard that it was said to them of old, Thou shalt not kill; but I say to you, that whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause, shall be in danger of the judgment; and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council; but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire" (Matt. 5:21–22). These, indeed, are the words of Christ. But we, more than those who are unbelievers, trample upon this law while we daily inflict ^D upon our brothers countless insults. And what is more ridiculous is that, while we beware of this word, "fool," we often inflict harsher insults, as if that word alone were the one to which punishment is assigned. But the matter is not so, but He declares this penalty for every reviler, as is clear from these words of Paul: "Be not deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God" (1 Cor. 6:9-10).

But if he who calls his brother a fool is worthy of the final punishment, he who calls him a malefactor, an envious man, a reckless man, a lover of vain glory, and casts upon him countless other such curses—to what flames of hell does he render himself liable? For that word, "fool" and "Raca," is far lighter than the things mentioned above. Wherefore, having omitted that, Christ set this forth, that you might learn from His words that if a lighter insult draws on hell, much more will those things which are heavier and more atrocious effect it.

The slanderous are excluded from the kingdom of heaven

Now, this snare is diabolical. For, in order to loosen the fear of future punishment for those who were once pricked in the heart by the charity of God, and to make them more remiss in obeying the commands, he brought in the consolation of hyperbole, which can indeed ensnare slothful souls in the present, but will be refuted in the day of judgment, when no gain will be able to come from it. For what, I ask, is the utility to those who are now deceived if they recognize the fallacy then, when they will not be able to be helped by repentance in the resurrection? Let us not, therefore, deceive ourselves, nor let us be circumvented into our own ruin, nor let us procure for ourselves another punishment, namely, from incredulity. For not only to not obey the commands of Christ, but even to not believe them, is the most grave...

^A burden; and because we are weighed down and choked by our conscience, and are anxious to cast off the great fear of the punishments laid down, we cast ourselves into another gulf, disbelieving those torments. And just as those who are held by a burning fever, even if they throw themselves into cold waters, do not shake off the suffocation, but add another fire to themselves, so we too, when pricked by the conscience of our sins, are compelled to plunge ourselves into the whirlpool of excess, so that we may sin henceforth without fear. For we are not only angry with our brethren present, but we often fight even with those who are absent; which is the excess of brutality. And the ones who are greater than us and more powerful, even when they commit injustice and insult us, we bear with great moderation because of our fear of them, but towards those who are our equals or our inferiors, we are hostile although they have not grieved us at all. So much does the fear of men have greater power ^B than the fear of Christ.

5. Is there, then, any hope of salvation for us, displaying such negligence and contempt? Where from, tell me? What grievous thing, then, or what burdensome thing did Christ demand of us? Do not be angry, He says, with your brother without cause. But this is much easier than bearing another who is angry without cause: for in the latter case, the material for the fire is already gathered, but in the former, with nothing lying underneath (as fuel), you yourself kindle the flame; and it is not equal, when another brings the torch, to be patient and not be burned, and when no one is inciting, to be quiet and at rest. For the one who has mastered that has shown the proof of the greatest philosophy, but the one who achieves this would be ^C worthy of no admiration. Since, therefore, we accomplish the greater task because of the fear of men, but for the sake of God we are not even willing to perform the lesser, consider of what punishment and retribution we make ourselves liable. Do not consider your brother to be only your equal, nor a free man, but also a slave: For in Christ Jesus there is neither slave nor free, according to the Apostle. So that even if we rage against slaves without cause, we shall undergo the same judgment; for he too is a brother, and has been deemed worthy of the true freedom, having one Spirit. Who then can show his own life to be free from reproach and from irrational and vain anger? For do not tell me of one who suffers this rarely, but of one who has never been caught at all; and until you show us this, you will not be able to ^D dissolve the threat, due to the fact that you have not suffered this continually. For even the thief and the fornicator, if they commit that sin even once, are not released from punishment because they have not dared to do it many times, but because they have dared to do it at all, they are punished.

And the part that follows this, who among the unbelievers would not think it a myth, seeing it overturned by us with such vehemence? For when God said: If you offer your gift at the altar, and there you remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go, first be reconciled to your brother, and then coming, offer your gift; we, however, who are at war with one another and disposed with guile, approach the altars. And God has made such haste for our reconciliation, that He suffers His own sacrifice to remain unaccomplished, and the ministry to be interrupted for the sake of reconciling the enmity and anger towards one another; yet we are so thoughtless of the matter, as to keep the enmity even for many days against our own heads. For Christ does not only punish those who harbor resentment, but also those who have been released from this passion, yet despise their brothers who are smitten. For since it is the lot of the wronged to hold resentment, while the wrongdoer would not easily be caught by this passion, for this reason He led the latter to the former, showing that he who also provided the root for the sin is more liable to that punishment. But we are not even thus instructed, but we grieve our brothers even for trifles; then as if nothing terrible has happened, we are negligent and forget those grieved by us, and we overlook long-extended enmity, not knowing that we will pay a greater punishment in proportion to the number of days we allow to intrude upon the sorrow, by this very fact, and by the reconciliation becoming more difficult for us later. For just as, when friendship holds us together, nothing of those things that divide will be able to easily have power or be believed; so, when enmity has taken possession of our souls, everything is easy and very simple for those who wish to incite us more, with true things being disbelieved, and only evil things being believed. For these reasons He commands to leave the gift at the altar and first be reconciled to the brother, so that we may learn that if at that time it is not permitted to delay this reconciliation, much more so in other times. But we hold the symbols of the things, but have fallen away from the truth itself, greeting one another when the gift is about to be offered, doing so mostly only with lips and mouth. But the Lord does not wish this, but that we give a kiss from the soul and a greeting from the heart to our neighbor. For this is to greet truly, while that is a kind of stage-play and hypocrisy, and he who loves in such a way would provoke God rather than reconcile Him. For He seeks from us a sincere and rooted friendship, not this, of which we carry about much of the shape and form, but have extinguished all the power, which itself is a proof of the iniquities that possess us. For because iniquity shall abound, He says, the love of many shall grow cold. And we do these things as men commanded not to be angry, nor to have any enemies, and if we should ever have them, only for days; for the sun, He says, let it not set upon your wrath. And we do not stop even at this, but we also weave plots against one another, and by what we say and by what we do bite and devour our own members: which is of brilliant madness. For we judge those who are incurably possessed by demons and madmen mostly from this. But what of the law concerning an adversary, and that concerning wicked desire, and lascivious eyes, and irrational and harmful friendship? For the right eye and the right hand signify to us nothing other than those who love us to our own harm; and the matter of those who have been separated from their wives, by whom has it not been often dissolved and trampled upon?

^A I am ashamed to say it, for it is a medium of destruction not only for oaths, but for frequent perjuries. For if to swear, even truthfully, is a crime and a transgression of the commandment, where shall we place perjury? And if that which is "yes" and does not exceed (Matt. v, 37) is "from the evil one," from whom shall that which exceeds this be?

Then, on the other hand, He says: "If anyone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other; and to him who wishes to go to law with you and take your tunic, let go your mantle to him; and whoever forces you to go one mile [128], go with him two. To him who asks of you, give, and from him who wishes to borrow from you, do not turn away" (Matt. v, 39-42). What can be said to these things? For at every one of these sayings it remains only that we weep and be covered with shame. Thus, traveling a path diametrically opposed to this one, consuming our whole time in disputes, fights, lawsuits, and quarrels, and bearing not even the slightest offense, whether of words or of deeds, we are ferocious even over the most trivial things.

If you are able to mention some who have dispensed much to the poor and subsequently have come into contempt on account of poverty, having suffered countless evils, you will number these as few and very rare; yet you will show no one who is a philosopher in the way we are describing here; for this life is far more spiritual than that one. For it is not the same thing to give freely and, when stripped of everything, to bear it patiently. And what do I say "to bear"? For what Christ said is far more excellent than this: since His word turns the souls of the wronged away from anger against the wrongdoers, so that He does not permit them not only to complain about what has been snatched away, but even commands them to offer what is left of their own accord, and to show greater readiness for bearing evils than the others show madness for inflicting them. For when he who wishes to do wrong finds him whom he is wronging more prepared to suffer than he himself had intended, and after he has fulfilled his own desire he sees the one whom he wronged showing himself from a position of abundance even more ready to suffer other things, he departs defeated, blushing at the magnitude of that forbearance; and even if he were a beast, or something even more savage than this, he will henceforth be more moderate, having seen—by the comparison made between both—the wickedness of himself and the virtue of the other. I am seeking for this life, which I see set forth in the Scriptures, but nowhere else displayed in deeds. And do not tell me that someone has patiently borne being wronged; for that could happen through a deficiency of strength. But if, even with equals against whom he was able to take vengeance, he showed this, yet did not proceed so far as to conquer his desire and give more than the other wished, and show his magnanimity by readily adding other things to what was snatched—that is what is far superior.

And that this reaches the very summit, Christ commanded those who do such things, and who offer proof of this in money, in body, and in all other things, to be counted in the number of friends, indeed of genuine friends. For He says: Do not just add other gifts to the one robbing and taking away, but even love that person with most vehement and sincere love. ^B To declare this, when He wished to do so, He said: "Pray for those who persecute you" (Luke vi, 28): which we are accustomed to do only for those whom we love exceedingly. But lest you should think these words were spoken hyperbolically, and lest you should fear a diabolical deception, He brings a reason and cause consistent with these words: "For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the publicans do the same? And if you have embraced those who embrace you, what more do you do? Do not even the Gentiles do this?" (Luke vi, 32). Since, therefore, we differ in no way from publicans and Gentiles in this matter, how can we keep ourselves from mourning and tears? But would that this evil were the only one present: for now we are so far from loving our enemies that we even turn away from and hate those who love us. For to envy them, and to take away their glory and reputation by our words and deeds, is the mark of those who hate and turn away. Thus we not only differ in no way from the Gentiles, but in this matter we are affected far worse than they. And Christ indeed commanded us to pray for those who slander us, but we plot deceits, and being commanded to bless those who curse us, we load the same ones with countless curses.

Vana gloria bona opera inutilia reddit.

^D "Our… as we also forgive our debtors," who is there then who can say this with confidence? For even if we do not wrong our enemies, we nevertheless keep the wound incurable. But Christ does not wish us to forgive only in that way, but to number them among our first friends. Therefore, as I said before, He commanded us to pray for them. If further

^A you have done no wrong, but you still turn away and do not look upon them with joy, and the wound in your soul is still fresh, you have not yet fulfilled the commandment which Christ commanded you—even though you have committed no offense. How, then, can you plead for God to be merciful to those who have sinned against you, when you have not yet become merciful yourself? As someone wise has said, mocking this ^B state of mind: *Shall a man keep anger against a man, and seek healing from the Lord? He has no mercy on a man who is his equal, and does he plead for his own sins? Being himself flesh, he preserves wrath, and who shall make atonement for his sins?* (Eccli. 28. 3-5). I would have wished to be silent from this point on, and to stop my discourse at what has already been said, so great is the shame and confusion I feel about proceeding further; for the more the argument advances, the more clearly it demonstrates this war that we have raised against the commandments of Christ, and this irreconcilable enmity. But what is the profit of our silence when the facts themselves cry out this battle, and the One who is to judge us knows all things clearly even before the deeds themselves? ^C Indeed, as for: *Do not store up for yourselves on earth, but in heaven*, though they be few, one might find some who have followed this well. For all the rest, as if they had heard the opposite—and had been commanded to store up on earth—have thus abandoned heaven, have been glued to all things on earth, are maddened by the gathering of riches, and hating God, they love mammon. But as to: *Do not be anxious about tomorrow*, I know of no one who has heard this and been persuaded, because of our little faith. For this reason, covering my face, I will pass over this commandment. For it was fitting that Christ should be believed even when speaking simply; but now, even when He provides irrefutable arguments and brings forth examples, such as that of the birds and the grass, He is not believed by us. Instead, we are consumed by the care of these things just like the Gentiles—perhaps even with less greatness of soul—and though not even commanded to pray for these things, we expend all our zeal upon them. Therefore, as I said, blushing ^D I will pass over this commandment, and I will come to what follows, to see if I might find some small consolation for this shame. What, then, does He say after this? *Do not judge, so that you may not be judged* (Matt. 7. 1). I indeed imagined that I would find some consolation for our shame here, but I will speak of an addition no less significant than those before. For even if we had committed no other wrong, this alone is sufficient to lead us to the extreme hell, so bitterly do we sit as judges of the faults of others, while we overlook our own beams, and our whole life is spent in busybodying and condemning the affairs of others. And you would not easily find anyone—not a man of the world, not a monk, not one of the clergy—free from this sin, even though such a threat lies over it: *For with the judgment you judge, you will be judged*, He says; *and with the measure you measure, it will be meted out to you* (Matt. 7. 2). Yet, although it carries such punishment and no pleasure of sin, we all rush into this evil, as if eager and competing, that we might enter into the furnace of hell, not only through one, but through many paths. ^A And we have become careless not only regarding things that seem difficult, but we have likewise collapsed regarding the lighter things, transgressing both alike, and showing by our performance of the easiest things that it is not because of the heaviness of the commandments that we do not accomplish the more difficult ones, but because of our own disregard. For tell me, what labor is there in not being a busybody about another's affairs, or in not condemning the faults of one's neighbor? On the contrary, it is the meddling and judging of others that requires labor. Who then, hearing this, will ever believe us that we came to disobey out of sluggishness, and not out of zeal and a lack of desire? For when the things He commands to do are easy and very simple to those who wish, but the things He forbids are more difficult and troublesome—yet we omit the things commanded and do the things forbidden—will not our enemies say that we sin in this way as if to defy Him? For that there is no labor in Christ’s commandments, He Himself declared, saying: *Take my yoke upon you; for my yoke is kind, and my burden is light* (Matt. 11. 29). But we, through our unspeakable sluggishness, cause even the light things to appear burdensome to the many. To one who wishes to be forever idle and sleeping, even the sharing of food and drink seems altogether troublesome; ^B but those who are watchful and sober do not recoil even before the most wondrous and difficult tasks, but embark upon them with greater confidence than the lazy and sleepy do upon the very easy ones. For nothing, nothing is so easy that long sloth does not show it to us as very heavy and burdensome, just as there is nothing that zeal and eagerness do not make very easy, however troublesome and difficult it might be. For tell me, what was there more difficult than to be in danger of death every day? Yet the blessed Paul called this light, saying: *For this light moment of our affliction is working for us an eternal weight of glory in excess* (2 Cor. 4. 17-18). For even if the thing is heavy by nature, it becomes light by the hope of things to come, the cause of which he himself set down, saying: *Because we look not at the things that are seen, but at the things that are not seen*. 6. Let us also look at what follows. *Do not give*, He says, *what is holy to the dogs, nor cast your pearls before the swine* (Matt. 7. 6). Christ gave this commandment in the nature of a precept; but we, through vanity, ^C senseless ambition, and this command, have overturned it, receiving into the communion of the mysteries people who are corrupt, faithless, and full of countless evils, simply and without examination; and before granting an accurate test of their own disposition, we reveal to them the whole argument concerning dogmas, and lead those who have not yet even been able to see the vestibules directly into the inner sanctum. For this reason, some of those thus initiated quickly ^D turn away, and perpetrate countless...

^A grave sins. And we are not only failing to perform this, but we even ignore the other commands altogether, and one may see them broken by everyone. For when Christ said: Whatever you wish that men should do to you, do also to them (Matt. VII, 12), and we have been ordered to enter through the narrow gate, we seek the broad one everywhere. And that certain secular men should embrace and love this way of life is not so very surprising; but that men who appear to have crucified themselves should pursue it more than they do, this truly brings great stupor, or rather, the matter seems to resemble a riddle. For if you ask to come to a certain ministry, you shall hear the monks—so to speak, almost all of them—saying these things first of all; for they inquire whether they can find rest there, and whether he who invites them can provide them with repose; and they bandy the name of rest about of their own accord. What are you saying, my man? Ordered to walk on a narrow road, do you ask about rest, and ordered to enter through the narrow gate, do you seek the broad one? What could be worse than this perversity? But so that you do not think that I say these things to condemn others, I will tell of a matter that concerns myself.

Chrysostom withdraws to the dwellings of the monks

The great force of heavenly desire

^A Christ. Therefore he also said: "In all these things, he says, we more than conquer through him who loved us." And do not wonder; for if the friendship of men has often made them dare to face death, what would the love of Christ not work? What difficulty would it not make easy? Thus, to him, all things were bearable, as he looked only toward the one he desired, and he considered suffering everything for his sake as greater than all pleasure and enjoyment—as indeed it is. For he did not consider himself to be on earth, nor in the present life, nor to be walking among men; but as one already having the heavenly lot and living as a citizen with the angels, and having received the kingdom, and enjoying face-to-face vision, he thus despised the present things, both pleasant and painful; and he had no concern for rest, which is what is continuously sought after by us. Rather, he cried out, saying: "To this very hour we hunger and thirst, and we are poorly clothed, and beaten, and wander about, and we labor, working with our own hands; being reviled, we bless; being persecuted, we endure; being defamed, we entreat." And again: "We have become as the offscourings of the world, and are the refuse of all things until now." For once he had turned the eyes of his soul to heaven and was struck with the beauty there, he could not endure to turn back to earth; but just as some poor and destitute man, having been locked up for all his time in a dark and lowly cell, when he sees a king shining with much gold and the flash of jewels, would no longer choose even to bring to mind the house of his own poverty, but will arrange everything in order to move to that dwelling, if it be permitted—so also that blessed man, having peered at the things in the heavens, despised the poverty here, and while he associated with men because of the necessity of the body, he turned toward nothing of the things here, but transferred his whole self to that city.

And why do I speak of the painful things in this present life? So much did the desire for Christ incline him toward himself, that if it were even proposed to suffer those immortal punishments for the sake of Christ, he would never have declined even this. For not as we mercenaries, fearing hell and desiring the kingdom, ^B did he serve Christ, but having been seized by another love, far better and more blessed than this, he suffered and did everything for none other reason, but to comfort the love alone which he had for Christ; which so took his reason by force, that even that which was more precious to him than all things—I mean, to be with Christ—he would have willingly preferred to be alienated from, for the sake of Christ, and would have embraced even such an unspeakable fall as if it were one of the things most to be prayed for, and would have chosen it with great readiness.

8. And perhaps now the thing said seems unclear to many; but when I shall speak of it more clearly, then again, to those to whom it was previously unclear, it will seem unbelievable. And it is no wonder; for even that blessed man himself, having expected that he would be disbelieved concerning these things, for this reason spoke in advance: "I tell the truth in Christ, I do not lie, my conscience bearing me witness in the Holy Spirit." And yet, having added so much to the discourse, and having called such witnesses of his conscience, he is even now still disbelieved. What then is this which he says? Listen. ^C Having discoursed concerning the sufferings in this world, and having said, "Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?" and having gone through all the things on earth, he ascends to heaven; and wishing to show that none of the torments here is great compared to despising them for the sake of Christ, he added, "that neither angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

What he says is the following: Not only will men not be able to tear me away from this friendship, but not even angels, nor if all the powers of the heavens should gather to the same purpose, will they have the strength for this. What do I say? Not even if it were necessary to fall from the kingdom, nor even if it were necessary to fall into hell for the sake of Christ, is even this fearful to me. For the "height and depth, and life and death" mean nothing other than this. Now Paul was saying these things, not as if angels would attempt to separate him from Christ, but he proposes even things that will never happen at all in his discourse, so that he might be able to present the great love that he had and make it clear to all. For such is the custom of those who love; they cannot bear to keep ^D the love in silence, but they carry the flame to all those suited to hear it, soothing their own soul by continuously recounting the excess of their desire. Which, therefore, that blessed man also did at that time; and having encompassed all things in his discourse—the things that are, the things that will be, the things that have happened, the things that will never happen, the things visible and the things invisible, and every torment, and every rest—as if these were not enough for him for the presentation of the passion, he set forth and placed other such things again in the discourse that do not even exist (for "any other creature" is of those that do not exist), and so he added, declaring that of all the things mentioned, nothing will be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

And he indeed raised his own love to such a height; but we who have been commanded to be his imitators do not even bear the tribulations here easily, but we are distraught and distressed no less than those who have a fever. For this long disease that has taken hold of our souls has become incurable with time, so that we cannot even take hold of the thought of sincere health, but even the recovery of it seems impossible to us from now on. And if we hear someone bringing the apostles into the midst and speaking of their accomplishments, it being necessary to mourn ourselves immediately because we have fallen so far short of them, we do not even consider the matter to be a sin, but we are disposed as if it were not even possible to reach that height. And if someone asks the cause, we immediately put forward this irrational apology...

saying: "That was Paul, and that was Peter." What of it? Was that Paul, and that Peter, not of the same nature as us? Did they not come into this life by the same way? Were they not nourished by the same food? Did they not breathe the same air? Did they not use the same things? Did not some of them take wives and have children, while others practiced secular arts, and others had even fallen into the very abyss of wickedness? "But," you will say, "they enjoyed the great grace of God." Yet if we were commanded to raise the dead, to open the eyes of the blind, to cleanse lepers, to raise the lame, to cast out demons, and to heal—in short—other such ailments, this excuse could be fittingly offered. But if an exact rule of life is proposed, and the exhibition of obedience, what accord is there between the two things?

On the grace and Holy Spirit received in baptism

Gratia requires our diligence. For since grace would not require our diligence beforehand, it would have been poured into everyone's souls all at once; for God is no respecter of persons. But because it requires our diligence, therefore it follows some and remains with them, flies away from others, and others it does not touch even from the beginning. Truly that God, having examined the resolve beforehand, thus gave grace—before that blessed one had exhibited anything marvelous—hear what He says about him: "He is a vessel of election unto me, to carry my name before the Gentiles, and kings, and of the children of Israel" (Acts 9:15). Even before this grace was present, He who searches our hearts testified to it. Let us not, therefore, deceive ourselves, beloved, by saying that it is impossible for anyone to be like Paul. Indeed, as far as grace and signs go, there will not be another Paul afterward, but as far as the diligence of life is concerned, whoever wishes can be of this kind: and if such men do not exist anywhere, it happens only because they do not wish it. But I do not know how I have slipped into this absurdity of seeking those who are like Paul, when I cannot even see any placed in the third or fourth degree after him. For this, indeed, one ought to mourn, to lament, and to weep—not for one day or another, but through the whole of one's life; for if someone shows himself to be affected in this way, he will not easily sin thereafter. But if you do not believe these words, consider those who mourn, those who are tormented by worldly grief; those not from the number of the many, nor those who lead a laborious life, but from the number of those pampered ones who know nothing but pleasures. For those who give themselves to drunkenness and the belly, who draw out their feasts until evening and their suppers until the middle of the night, who seize the belongings of others, who spare neither the poor, nor the widow, nor the needy, who exhibit great cruelty—if they are ever seized by a grave mourning that can move and disturb the soul to its depths, then, having dismissed those voluptuous and wicked thoughts, they transfer themselves to the life of philosophers, exhibiting severity, vigils, sleeping on the ground, endurance, fasting, silence, modesty, humility, and humaneness.

^A And if anyone wanted to set fire to their possessions, along with the whole house, they are not provoked. Many, indeed, I know who, after the loss of their dearest ones, have exchanged their life in the city for the country and its goods, while others have built their homes by the tombs of the departed and brought their life to a close there. ^B But these things are later on; while their grief is at its height, they have no thought for any of the things present, but the madness that they had regarding the care and gathering of money, that regarding the acquisition of power and the glory of the multitude, they have—like some grass, or even the flower of grass—burned away in the fire of their despondency, thrown from their soul; so much then does the mind shift toward philosophy that it cannot endure even to utter a word concerning any of the pleasures of the present life; rather, everything that seemed to be for pleasure previously seems to them repulsive and appears most bitter. And no one, either of the household or of friends, would dare then to utter a word concerning those things in this world that are very urgent; for everything, being pushed aside, ^C gives way to the words concerning philosophy, the human soul being trained by grief then, as in a sacred place, in the worthlessness of human nature, the timeliness of the present age, the corruptible and unstable nature of worldly things, and the hypocrisy of the stage of events. Then there is great contempt for money, then the destruction of anger, then indifference to ambition; and neither envy could nest there, nor pride run riot in one crushed by grief, nor does desire inflame the profligate; but with all these things banished from there, one single thought alone is established, which continuously holds the image of the one who has died; this is food, drink, sleep, pleasure, rest, and much consolation; this is glory, wealth, power, and luxury.

10. Thus we ought to have mourned the loss of our own salvation, not to mention anything else; with such longing and eagerness ought the eye of the soul to have been turned to that point for all, and everything for us ought to have been memory and reproduction of that. ^D Yet now, some who have lost children and wives occupy their mind with nothing other than imagining those who have been torn from them; but we, who have lost the kingdom of heaven, consider everything rather than this. And among them, no one, even if he happens to be of the most royal lineage, is ashamed of the law of grief; but he will even sit on the ground, and lament bitterly, and change his clothing, and endure all the other things with great eagerness that follow from that punishment; and he will consider neither his upbringing, nor the condition of his body, nor the illnesses that follow thereafter from that misery, but will bear everything with great ease. And these things not only men, but even women, even if they are very weak, demonstrate, and even more than these. But we—not mourning children or wives, but the loss of a soul, a soul not of another, but our own—make pretexts, holding up the weakness of the body and tenderness of upbringing. And if only this were the terrible thing! But now we do not even do those things in which we do not need the energy of the body at all. For where, tell me, is there a need for bodily strength when it is necessary to crush one’s heart, when to pray soberly and wakefully, when to reflect on sins, when to destroy pride and arrogance, when to humble one’s reasoning? For these are the things that also make God merciful to us, and they do not require much labor; and yet we do not even do these. For the wearing of sackcloth, and the shutting of oneself in a small room, and sitting in darkness, this is not all that constitutes mourning, but it is to keep turning back the memory of one’s own evils at all times, and to torture the conscience with these thoughts, to measure out constantly the length of the road, how far we are left behind from the kingdom of heaven. And how shall this be? he says. How? If we have Gehenna always before our eyes, and the angels who then run everywhere and gather from the whole inhabited world those who are about to be led away into Gehenna; if we consider the falling away from the kingdom, how great an evil it is, apart from Gehenna.

The reason why it is not easy to be saved.

It was possible, then, to extend our discourse to a greater length, but since it has been spoken to us for the sake of obedience and no other need, these things also have been written beyond what is necessary. For I know that you both possess the virtue of compunction accurately yourself, and could impart it to others even while being silent, if only they were worthy to live a little while with your piety and to see your crucified life. So that if those who live now need to learn compunction, they should walk to your abode; and those who come after should hear of your deeds; for I believe that the narrative of your life alone will provide great impetus toward this. Therefore I entreat and implore you to pay us back the recompense at last, and to return to us your prayers, so that we might not only speak about compunction, but also demonstrate this thing through deeds; since teaching without doing brings not only no profit, but great loss and condemnation to one who manages his own life with such inattention. For it says, "Not everyone who says to me, Lord, Lord, but the one who performs [them] and teaches, he shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven."